God WANTS You Back

Jeremiah 15:15-21New International Version (NIV)

15 Lord, you understand;
    remember me and care for me.
    Avenge me on my persecutors.
You are long-suffering—do not take me away;
    think of how I suffer reproach for your sake.
16 When your words came, I ate them;
    they were my joy and my heart’s delight,
for I bear your name,
    Lord God Almighty.
17 I never sat in the company of revelers,
    never made merry with them;
I sat alone because your hand was on me
    and you had filled me with indignation.
18 Why is my pain unending
    and my wound grievous and incurable?
You are to me like a deceptive brook,
    like a spring that fails.

19 Therefore this is what the Lord says:

“If you repent, I will restore you
    that you may serve me;
if you utter worthy, not worthless, words,
    you will be my spokesman.
Let this people turn to you,
    but you must not turn to them.
20 I will make you a wall to this people,
    a fortified wall of bronze;
they will fight against you
    but will not overcome you,
for I am with you
    to rescue and save you,”
declares the Lord.
21 “I will save you from the hands of the wicked
    and deliver you from the grasp of the cruel.”

The reason that I chose this scripture to share this morning is because it shows an intimate conversation between Jeremiah and God.  Jeremiah was a great prophet and the Hebrew tradition holds him in a very high regard.  Do you remember last week when Jesus asked, “Who do people say that I am?” and the disciples replied that many people thought Jesus was a few different people?  One of those people was Jeremiah.  Jeremiah was called by God to live in isolation for many years.  God told Jeremiah not to marry, to have children, or even socialize at funerals and celebrations.  Jeremiah preached a progressive message that emphasized the individual’s responsibility for sins rather than a communal responsibility.  He dealt with insults, persecution and rejection.  And he dealt with much of this alone.  Jeremiah was tired of it and the scripture I just read to you is the result of his tiredness.  It was the result of his frustration with God.  I don’t know about you, but for me it is a relief to know that one of God’s most trusted prophets was willing to share this conversation with the rest of us.  As a minister, Jeremiah’s words echo a truth that I feel all too often.  While I personally feel relief in reading Jeremiah’s conversation with God, I know that many of you most likely sometimes feel this way as well.  The weight of ministry is heavy.  The responsibility of church leadership is hard.  And so often we keep asking ourselves why do we keep doing it?  

Before I can answer the question of why we keep going through the peaks and valleys of church leadership, I must define what church leadership means.  There are a couple obvious answers... The minister, the elders and deacons, the board members of a church.  However, within the confines of who we are as the congregation of Fairview and the surrounding community, we are all leaders.  We may not see it as that.  We may only desire to come to this church, sing some hymns, greet everyone, pray for those in need, celebrate with those who have something to celebrate, take communion and get on with the rest of our week.  Even within that routine, you are leaders.  There are young eyes watching you.  There are many people desiring to have what you have.  Whether it’s your intention or not, you are a leader.  Maybe you’re more comfortable as a follower, what then?  That’s fine, there will be opportunities to follow but as a called Christian, you are a leader.  When you live in such a way that others see God at work in you, people want to be a part of that.  They desire to have what you have.  You have been called to lead them into God’s Kingdom.  Maybe that isn’t what you signed up for, maybe you don’t feel obligated to lead.... Maybe you do feel that way.  Sometimes I feel that way.  However, our personal relationship with God puts us in the forefront.  It puts us in a position to lead whether or not we are comfortable or feel capable to do so.  To state it simply, the Church as a whole is leader.  And within our denomination specifically, we are a movement for wholeness in a fragmented world.  You are one of the many leaders in that movement.  

Before I can answer the burning question of why we continue with ministry when we feel like Jeremiah felt, let’s take a closer look at God’s response to Jeremiah’s plea.  Jeremiah’s words confirm that ministry and any form of church leadership is not an easy job.  Ministry is not simply a checklist of completing one task and heading onto the next.  Instead, the work of ministry touches the very core of our being.  Jeremiah is not the only one to express this sort of struggle with God.  Within many of the Psalms, David also expresses this kind of feeling.  God doesn’t want us to suppress or deny these kinds of feelings.  He knows the work is hard.  Suppression and denial allow feelings of bitterness to swell and even words and actions that harm others will start to take root if left unattended.  You see lifting these thoughts and feelings up to God allows God to step in and start healing the wounds.  It’s ok to have these feelings of frustration at times but we serve this church and everyone outside it much better when we take these frustrations before God.  You see, when we lay these thoughts and feelings in front of God we begin the process of repentance.  Repentance is God’s opportunity to heal.  And within that healing, there are these intense interactions that steer us closer to God.  Beneath the hurt exist the gifts of mercy and grace and love.  God told Jeremiah in this exchange, “If you repent, I will restore you that you may serve me.”  Other translations say it differently, “If you turn back, I will take you back, and you shall stand before me.”  You see, repentance is turning back to God and God openly taking you back.  God wants you back.  Whatever is holding you back from repentance, whatever is driving your lack of desire for any form of church leadership, give it to God.  

Here is an example of what I mean from outside the church setting.  As many of you know, Tyler Sutter and I run an organization called “PHS Alumni Football.”  This is our 7th year doing so and mental fatigue has begun to set in on us.  The week before the first game, Tyler and I talked and we came to the conclusion that both of are simply too busy.  We were struggling to find time to watch film and hand out helmet stickers to the team.  We didn’t really want to organize another fundraiser and were at the point of dropping the whole thing.  Not for any reason other than we wanted to free up some time.  We legitimized these feelings by saying we are too busy with family and work to make time for anything else.  Sound familiar?  After coming to this conclusion and letting some of the coaching staff know of our decision, I felt this sense of relief.  Later that evening, I got a text from one of the coaches telling of how much the kids enjoy what we do.  How they strive both as an individual and as a team to earn these stickers.  The coach explained that this is one of the reasons the kids put more effort into practice and it helps build a better team atmosphere.  You see, Tyler and I had lost sight of the ramifications that our decision might have because we were solely focused on ourselves.  I finally work at job that allows me to make it to practice on time and last Thursday was my first real opportunity to be a part of it... I really enjoyed it.  I think about the opportunity I almost missed.

So why did Jeremiah continue despite unending pain and feeling like a spring that fails?  Why do we continue despite feelings of church fatigue and despair?  Jeremiah answers that question in chapter 20:9, “If I say, ‘I will not mention him (God), or speak any more in His name,’ then within me there is something like a burning fire shut up in my bones; I am weary with holding it in, and I cannot.”  God’s kingdom is a fire that cannot be put out.  No matter our feelings and maybe even a complete turning of our back on God, will create within us a void that is not capable of being filled by anything other than our relationship with God.  We can try.  God, can we try to fill that void with absolutely anything but it leaves a whole that cannot be filled.  We will find ourselves delving deeper and deeper into whatever we are using to separate ourselves from God.  Trust me, we will find something to attempt to fill those depths but we will be unsuccessful which makes the road to repentance that much more difficult.  That being said, I want you to know that no matter what you have been trying to use to fill that void, no matter the depths of the despair you may be feeling, God wants you back.  God will take you back.  The Biblical account of Jeremiah’s repentance does not exist but our scripture for this morning comes from chapter 15.  The book of Jeremiah goes through 52 chapters and Jeremiah’s ministry was a 40 year journey which implies that he repented.  Here is what I want you to take away from Jeremiah’s example: The ability to acknowledge and repent of one’s feelings is simply part of the journey of faith and not doing so will cause you to be weary and tired from holding it in. I ask you to consider the opportunities you may miss if you don’t repent and turn back to God.       Amen.